I am considering coming home as I publish this post

Thought I would post some more pictures of the magnificent prairie LIGHT and my neighborhood and me in my neighborhood. As you can tell, with no job yet and school not starting till next week, I clearly have too much time on my hands and/or too great of an ability to procrastinate. Ahhh, well I am happy to experience perhaps the nicer parts of Winnipeg before the fall/winter sets in-- this sentence was written as a mosquito took a juicy bite from my neck!!!

P.S. Post comments God Dammit.
examples of different kinds of comments:

a) critical comment: "Get a job you lazy bum"

b) complimentary comment: " You made a wonderful decision moving to the land of mosquitos and cold and though I miss you desperately every day of my life, I know that you will soon be a happy as a plum"

c) inquiring comment: "What do you do all day"? or "Have you painted your other room yet"?, "Any more sightings of hunks in trucks with trees in the back"?

ETC...

OR alternately you can tell me something entirely un-related, something about your exciting and fulfilling life!

Wolseley Mayhem

The neighborhood I live in is called Wolseley and it is very close to the University of Winnipeg, which yes is very convenient for me (and likely will seem like a real blessing once the winter kicks in). However it also means that in the past week this cute, peaceful, tree lined street has become home to many first year university students eager to embrace their newfound freedom wholeheartedly.

I noticed something fishy was going on when I saw a group of at least 5 boys (I can't bring myself to call 18 yr. old's men) attempting to move their beds into the house via a small second floor window, in the house directly across the street from us. I suppose they were having trouble snaking the beds through the staircases of the house and felt that this was a good strategy. It was quite a comedy to witness as they hoisted bed after bed up through the windows... as you can tell I still have copious amounts of time on my hands (school doesn't start until next week and I have yet to locate a job) to engage in people watching. Any way this house of boys likes to PARTY. They had a party on Sunday night which was loud but I barely noticed as I stumbled into bed slightly intoxicated and totally exhausted that night ( recall the 'Times Changed' night) and then they had another party which was of an even greater volume last night.

Last night I did not go out. I did however get into a slight bit of a homesick mood which I tried to stave off by chatting to Jackie on the phone, reading and going to bed early-ish. Unfortunately my homesick mood made me very vulnerable to irritation and very prone to hardcore insomnia... the party, composed of what sounded like about sixty first year, hormone ridden/ alcohol soaked kids, did not help this matter. At about 12 am I turned off the light and tuned into a epic auditory experience. From my bed I experienced all phases of the party, first I experienced the tamer sounds of an acoustic guitar sing along, followed by the sounds of a stereo and voices getting louder and louder as the booze bottles no doubt got emptier and emptier, then I heard a lot of sex jokes and sex references and girls feigning disgust and boys chuckling at their cleverness or whatever, then I listened to about a half an hour of skate board tricks... directly below my window (gotta love the sound of boards slamming the pavement over and over again). And in no time at all the fights started (I was anxiously awaiting them... knowing that they meant it would all be over soon), first their was a fight between two girls which involved a long session of one girl pretending to be a baby to the other girl repeating "wa wa wa" in a remarkably obnoxious voice over and over again, and then of course there were the requisite fights between the couples... fights that don't need explanation as I am sure you can all imagine them down to the most minute details. Yeah, so sleep didn't really greet this homesick gal till 'round 3:30 am which was pretty unfortunate considering this morning was my first official day as a Graduate Student as I had an orientation session at 9am!!

Although I feel like I should report on it, in truth there is little to say about the grad orientation. It was overall fairly standard and boring procedure, just about the various services on campus, etc. It is remarkably non- techy university, I can't even look at my schedule on line and the library staff came to the orientation to give a special announcement: they now offer an online database!!! What were they doing before? How did people do research? So curious and charming and slightly disconcerting.

On a final note, I would like to mention that I purchased a single (plastic) bottle of local Manitoba beer tonight (accompanied by Dane, as apparently it is too dangerous to wander around alone at night in this area) at an off sales venue. The venue is housed in a motel which is also a pawn shop and a chinese food restaurant. The vendor is protected by a piece of bullet proof glass. Need I say more.

Nighty night.

Times Changed + Dirty Dog

Before leaving Toronto I was told many, many things about Winnipeg... some from people who had been here before, some from people who were actually from here and some from people who had just heard things and felt entitled to pass what they had heard on. Most of the things I was told could be categorized as warnings. I was warned most frequently about the weather (i.e. the cold, which apparently rivals Siberia for coldest city in the world-- I learned this today), second most often I was told about the mosquitoes, occasionally I was warned about the violence (homicide capital of Canada) and finally I was warned that people didn't really go out at night (which for me is a warning that is almost as bad as the weather, mosquitoes and violence warning all combined). Luckily, a handful of thoughtful friends and acquaintances thought it might be good to send me out west with some of Winnipeg's highlights in mind so that I wouldn't feel as though I was moving to the equivalent of hell! One of the highlights that was mentioned to me on more than one occasion is a place called: Times Changed, and since arriving I have been itching to check it out.

Thanks again to my wonderful room mate, Dane, I did check it out last night and let me tell you, people most certainly DO GO OUT AT NIGHT in WINNIPEG. Apparently Sunday nights are the best nights for this old blues bar that has character beyond character beyond character, so I assume I saw the best of it and based on what I did see I will definitely be returning on future Sundays. It is a fairly small place that is literally plastered from floor to ceiling with posters and pictures that appear as non-sequitor to the foreigners eye but likely tell a cohesive story to the regulars and the old timers. My favorite poster, stuck up high but in clear view, read in bold plain font: WHAT WOULD NEIL YOUNG DO?. That's it, that's the whole poster, that's the message and the question! Amazing.

The bar is entirely centered around watching music. And the music consists of a band that has a rotating group of players and a rotating group of vocalists. The band and the vocalists perform old blues, folk and country tunes, although last night there was even a little psychedelic interlude... again, Amazing. Some of the musicians were pretty excellent and clearly dudes and ladies that had been playing and loving music for a long time. The vocalists were pretty dope too. There was one younger woman who got up and sang 'The House of the Rising Sun' and I swear I was fighting back tears with every bit of strength (and desire not to totally humiliate myself in the one place where I actually felt truly comfortable since arriving here) I had. She was clearly new to performing and had a shyness that combined with her powerful but timid voice just broke my heart. She hit every note perfectly (not an easy task with that song) but didn't quite break through her self consciousness and although this may have been a problem for another performer somehow it just made her execution of the song that much more intense. I spoke to her after the set, to let her know how great it was and she was super grateful and cute and told me that she had never performed in public before. Amazing x 100000000000000.

So yes Winnipeg does indeed have gems and the Times Changed is for sure one of them. When you all come visit me I can take you there, K?, K.

On a separate note Toad and I were taken to the 'dog park' today which was actually a dog field or a dog prairie ( it was just sun bleached grass-- no trees-- and went on and on and on), a little bit outside of the city and toad fell in a puddle of mud, here all the pictures to prove it. Unfortunately, they don't really capture how hilarious he looked. The poor guy didn't find it nearly as funny as his people companions did. He was then dipped in the dog pond, to clean the mud, which he found equally unpleasant and is now totally conked out under the bed and I don't expect to see him till tomorrow.

Lastly, thanks for joining guys... now don't forget to comment. Please comment. Sorry I'm so high maintenance.

Love,Myera.

p.s. apologies for sloppy writing, think I'm a tad sun stroked from the prairie/park

Calling all the ladies...

The theme of this entry is, thank heavens for my amazing room mate and Winnipeg loves hip hop.

Being inside my mind right now is like living on both ends of a teeter totter that has been hopped up on copious amounts of speed. The up/ down swings have reached a new and striking momentum, leaving me feeling pretty f-ing tired and not particularly myself. Cycling over the bridge that crosses the Assiniboine river, feeling the cold air coming off the water and glancing down to see the liquid quickly snaking along it's downward path, I can feel elated and certain that coming here was the right decision. Only to flip that decision entirely on it's head an hour later when trying to move between two supposedly 'close' establishments and finding that it requires a half hour of cycling through desolate, suburban style streets with the impending sense that I am indeed lost and there is NO one around to help me... Where are you Winnipeg, when I need you?

I wonder what moving to a new city is like for less emotionally volatile people? For people who care less about how beautiful or urban or interesting a city is and more about what they are actually there to do. Not that I don't care about what I came here for... it's just that I seem to want it all! And all at once too! Why am I such an incredible brat?

In other matters, Winnipeg loves, loves, loves hip hop. Dane, my dear room mate and the person that gets me out the house when I am contemplating booking a ticket home and giving the peg the finger, took me along to a couple things the other night and I learned a little about how people here party. First we went to a graffitti gallery party and then to a bar called the Windsor Hotel where the party relocated after the gallery shut down. In both venues Dane's friends were d.j.ing and the music was exclusively hip hop, good hip hop but admittedly mostly stuff I don't know.

The Windsor Hotel was one of these places where the seedy quality is where the appeal lies and I(perhaps more than most) have a real soft spot for this kind of atmosphere when it comes to night life. The bar was lined with big broad chested dudes drinking out individual mini-pitchers that look as though they contain about 2 pints worth of liquid, in the center there was a spattering of tables all packed with people downing round after round of shots and up at the front a group of fairly liquored girls dancing and having what looked to me like an awesome time. I felt a strong pang of nostalgia for nights of dancing with my girl friends (and sister!). Pangs that were intensified by the fact that I am not sure we have bars or parties or d.j.'s quite like this in Toronto and yet I can remember countless time that we have sat around wishing there was a good hip hop party to go to, like without having to go to a yuppie club. So girls, who want's to come to Winnipeg... I know you do.

xo T.O. xo

More on the importance of PEOPLE

It's an unusual challenge to not know anyone in an extremely friendly town. Considering that it is only my first week here it is truly remarkable how many people I have met. I have had at least one plan every day or evening since I have been here. These plans have been with people who typically have at least more than one degree of separation between myself and them and yet they are willing to take time from their lives to meet up! This level of friendliness is striking to me... I am not sure that I have encountered such warm welcomers up to this point in my life, a realization that has stirred some questions in my already question-ridden mind.

Encountering the warmth and generosity of these Winnipegers has generated an equal mix of relief and discomfort. Why the discomfort? The first reason that I can attribute to this (a reason that became crystalized for me through a long distance phone conversation with Noah... thanks Noah) is that I am simply not accustomed to this level of openess among virtual strangers and although I am thrilled that it exists, I find myself feeling insecure and even suspicious in it's presence! Ridiculous, I know. How is it possible that these interesting, established, funny, etc. folks actually want to meet me for coffee/lunch/drinks? They don't even know me. Moreover they already have friends, they don't need more. Anxiety soaked queries such as these rattle my brain before, during and after these otherwise very enjoyable little encounters with these warm hearted peggers.

This week of welcoming has none the less made a real impression on me. Next time, I am settled in a town, be it back in Toronto, here or elsewhere, and I hear of a newcomer I will most certainly extend invitations. Before moving here, I am not sure I had such conviction about this topic...I am not sure I even thought of it much. Living in Toronto I am so entirely enveloped with friends and family that I am not sure I step back and make an effort to include less integrated peeps-- then again, maybe I do I just have never considered the role it might have played in someone's life? Hard to say what it is you do socially when you are comfortable and everything is laid out for you (such as it was for me in Toronto), it's only when you shift things up and temporarily lose your day to day contacts and supports that your become conscious of how really important people are and how you have navigated the social realms so far.

In other matters, I have begun the job search for real. I have quite a few postings, some that I have found on my own and some that have been sent to me by the friendly locals, and tomorrow I intend to getting the cover letter factory rolling. Cover letters in the land of social services are a huge bitch to write, you have to be intensely particular about the language you use and be sure to outline all of your ideological beliefs down to most minute details-- it can be super stressful to write just a single page. I plan to find a library to settle into and tackle the task-- but first I have to find the library... ahh, nothing is simple when you move.

On a closing note, I bought a some kind of American South Western antique doo- hicky that I think is the total bomb and is in honor of the fact that I plan to start horse back riding lessons this Fall-- as any true prairie girl should. Here's a picture of this marvel... what do you think it is??? I spent time trying to figure it out on the internet but no cigar. The ladies at the antique store seemed to think it was something the horse would actually wear and the bell would alert you that it was coming your way... don't know what I think about this theory...

P.S. If you read this blog can you try and add yourself as a follower, I am scared that I am writing into the abyss

Pictures--below is the text post for today...

Success and Less Success

I'm still here, right here in the Peg and as I remind you, remember that I am also reminding myself-- it takes practice to know where you are...you know....

I must admit that I am feeling a whole lot better about being here than I was even three days ago, the charm of this city is becoming more apparent to me and I'm starting to wonder if their (the pegger's) warnings that I will NEVER leave might come true. Regardless if it is true or not, I am here for 3 years minimum and at this point that feels like FOREVER, but not necessarily in a bad way.

Two eventful things happened today. One wonderful and one funny/ a slight bit humiliating.

The wonderful thing that happened was that I went to the U of W's campus and met with the woman who heads up the Master's program I am doing. I was immediately comforted when I walked into her office as it had all of the fixings that I associate with seasoned social workers (and the kind of lady I hope one day to be). There were large and disorganized piles of paper covering her desk, at least four comfy chairs--decked out with little pillows-- squished into a relatively small space, a large window eclipsed by several hanging plants, a bookshelf stacked with amazing reads (if you have a penchant for mental health, gender issues, family dynamics and theories of trauma!) and all of the requisite posters with empowering messages scrawled in 80's style fonts across them. Might be hard to imagine if you haven't worked in social services, I however have seen many such offices and so appreciate the messy, unpretentious and overall welcoming feel of them.

Marilyn, the director, is as I expected, a pretty great lady. Within minutes of my being there she was on the phone with various higher-ups at agencies and organizations in the city trying to get me a job!!!! When does that ever happen that you go to meet your University program director and they look for a job for you. AHHHH, these nice people, I tell ya.

Marilyn and I chatted about the courses and I noticed the combination of sensations that indicates I am in the right place: warm, fuzzy feeling in chest and quick, excited feeling in brain. The program is incredibly down to earth, intellectually rigorous and genuinely committed to creating caring, intelligent and accountable therapists. So yeah, I felt about 1000 times better after leaving what turned into our hour long meeting.

The other noteworthy thing that happened today was that I attended a two-year old's birthday, however amazingly I attended it a day early. Yes, that's right, I was so excited to have a plan (the said b-day party that I was invited to by someone I met over the weekend) that I giddily biked over a somewhat considerable distance with some kind of desert loaf in my backpack as an offering, only to find an empty house with a very irate dog barking at me from behind the door. I called the mother of the 2 yr old and she regrettably informed me that her son's birthday is tomorrow and that I should come back then as they are not home at the moment. Well, I must say I felt pretty f-ing embarrassed, not to mention totally fucking itchy as the mosquitoes appeared to be extra plentiful in the 2 yr old's hood.

On the plus side, biking to the non-existent party gave me an opportunity to see more of the city and to feel more comfortable navigating it. One thing that is worth mentioning about this here Winnipeg is that the light is pretty special, I guess it's prairie light? It's hard to describe but just imagine a light that seems to stretch on in every direction endlessly. Big light, broad light. Beautiful.

Till next time dudes and dudettes.

P.S. Here are some photos of the house and toad. They are kind of shoddy 'cause they were taken with my phone...so don't judge!